[[OOC: The below entries will not be in chronological order. Just whatever order I decide to write.]]
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I had the talk with Rey today. He was fine with everything. I told him all the little secrets of who I am. The secrets I've only told you. And he doesn't mind. I told him if I ever want to be more physical, I'll let him know, but he doesn't mind if we aren't. He doesn't mind if I fall in love with someone else either. Not that I think it's likely to happen. Lothian is cute and I like her a lot, but she likes big guys. I wonder if I could set her up with Hazamar? He's big. Handsome. I bet he's gentle though in relationships. Caring and nurturing. He seems like he would be. Rey sure is. I know people pick on him, say he's not very bright, but I don't agree. Rey just thinks differently. His mind isn't like mine, and he takes longer to get to some conclusions, but he reaches other, wilder, ones quicker. I wish I could understand how he gets there sometimes. He's quick, just uneducated. And I think maybe sometimes he ignores the truth because he's afraid of it. He'd rather pretend someone is just sleeping than admit they are dead. Like when we found Vincent and he thought it was a prank.
The blood on my robe that night wasn't a prank. The bits of body. I've seen a lot. I remember helping Granny Harriet at her clinic. I know what death looks like. It shouldn't look like that. It shouldn't happen like that. People shouldn't be in that condition. I'm sorry. I've been rambling again. I'm really glad Rey likes me. I didn't know if I was going to find this. It's nice.
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I'm not sure how I feel about things here yet. My parents came to Edana thinking it would be safer. Thought it was, just a matter of time until our village felt the war. I'm not sure. No one has cared about us yet there. And Kelt may not have been stable, but at least the threats were human. They talk about the dead being on the march here. Some fortress to an evil thing. People have been taken off the streets. This can't be better. But we sold everything to be here. And dad is too old to work the land anyway. Mom's still healthy, but it must be tiring for her too? There's a General who seems nice but I'm not really a military person. I only met his soldiers once, at a tavern. They were kind enough, I guess, but it felt like I was a child again, and the big kids were nearby. He told me there's a church to the south. Maybe I can seek them out? I think I want to be a healer like Granny Harriet is or maybe a preacher like Granny Suzy was.
I've been feeling the "calling" stronger now. And I can't get clean. There's always dirt on me. I keep finding it somewhere. Little smudges. Or leaves in my hair. I don't like it. I stayed inside one day, after a bath, and a dry maple leaf showed up in my hair. How? I feel something when I touch it. Something like when I walk barefoot. It's like when I pray to The Four. It feels like I'm touching something. I don't understand this. I don't know what's happening to me. I'm afraid to tell mom and dad. I wish Granny Suzy were still alive to talk about it. Oh, that reminds me. Granny Harriet sent a letter. She says the Wilkersons are doing a good job with the farm and are taking good care of the land. They're still letting her keep her clinic there for the town. But she's taken on a student. Someone who can take over for her. She said her daughter retiring may be a sign she should too. Maybe I should write to her about the dirt? She's always wearing flowers in her hair.